I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
