Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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