I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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