You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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