glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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