Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
