she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
