Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
