somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Sorry about my life...
Randomize