I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
