I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
