if i can run in heels then i can drive
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
