Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
