I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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