I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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