his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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