Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
