This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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