That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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