Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize