Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
