he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
