i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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