That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I party with great urgency now.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
