a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
