I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
