He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
