I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
i drank out of a bidet.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize