Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Drunk is a universal language darling
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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