This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
