Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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