when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
