Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
