kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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