would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
