Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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