3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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