The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
