i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
