ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
