Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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