my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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