OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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