He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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