I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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