Hey man sorry I got all grabby
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
