I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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