I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I've blown a few things in my day
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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