Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
