Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
