i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
