Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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