...so i touched it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
